Making do in the gym while my shoulder heals. It’s 2 am when I rouse from a drug-induced sleep to absolute torture. Not just any pain: I-don’t-possess-the-vocabulary-sufficient-enough-to-describe-it pain. Knowing my wife is fully asleep in the other room, I bear down and try to tough it out. And then I scream in agony. The pain-killers … Continue reading Update: What Coed Kickball, obscene medical bills, and a year of perspective taught me about training.
Hey there! Usually, I start these things with a story or anecdote, you know, one to rope you in and help you identify with me or whatever, but instead, I just want to let you in on a secret: I don't really love to train. Sure, working in a gym gives me very few excuses … Continue reading More Juice for the Squeeze: Get more out of your Workouts
Butt Stuff Now that I've said it, you're thinking it. Go ahead, no judgement here. When you're ready let's talk about butt stuff in a gym setting. Namely, growing a bigger, stronger, firmer, wanna-grab-it-in-the-bedroom thicc booty. For centuries the glute Gods and Goddesses hath proclaimed squats to be the king of all booty exercises. Hyperbole … Continue reading Butt Stuff Done Better: 5 Exercises for a Better Bum
I first wrote this post sometime in the late summer of 2018, after blowing out my shoulder and *before* surgery. I have a follow-up article in the works. “If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.” -Lewis Carroll Starting in the fall of 2017, I had one goal: Stop being … Continue reading What Coed Kickball and $900 in medical bills taught me about Training
First published March 7, 2018 There are things I’m objectively right about: U2 is and always has been a terrible bandKale is the beef jerky of leafy greens (and it's awful)Forrest Gump will always be a delightful movie But I’ll admit that over the years I’ve been wrong about some things, specifically when it comes to fitness. … Continue reading A Meathead Embraces Cardio
First published January 3rd, 2018. It’s a hot and sticky Friday evening as I make my way to south Nashville. “Am I going to survive this?” I wonder as I wipe the anxious sweat off my palms. I’ve done some hellacious workouts in my time, but never this. In the parking lot my muscles already begin … Continue reading I Tried Crossfit (and didn’t die)